He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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