just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize