Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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