I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
