But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
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We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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