Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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