wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
