still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Randomize
