At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
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