What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
