It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(