Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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