I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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