So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
