i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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