Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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