btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
