You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
