Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
lol hangovers are for mortals.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
