Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
