this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
