and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
