he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
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