Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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