Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
