Christians are straight up FREAKS
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
