I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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