how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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