You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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