I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
