I want you more than these girls want KFC
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
