So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize