It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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