her vagine was all disorganized.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.