I want to make a zoo with you.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
