im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
