wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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