shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
