So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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