it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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