Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Randomize
