Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize