You made me cry and you don't even care
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
