Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
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