so that wasnt chicken after all
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
