I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
