It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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