I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
