It's just like the Real World with babies
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
we're making bets on your personal life
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
