Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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