so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
